Stress: 5 ways to rid your life of it - By DeAnn Sicard

The following article was first used in the Feb issue of MRW Impressions, newsletter for the Midwest Romance Writers. It may be reprinted by sister RWA chapters with proper credit to chapter and author. Bloggers are welcome to link to it but not republish.

We live under a perpetual cloud of stress each and every day, whether it's from the holiday seasons, financial, family, health, work and so on and so on.  I'm sure you get the picture.

 

If we're not careful, all this stress can lead to health and emotional issues.  Stress may be a part of our lives on a daily basis but that doesn't mean it has to rule our lives.  We can combat stress in simple and even fulfilling ways.  Our biggest challenge (another type of stress) is to find the technique that will work in our lives.

 

Here are five strategies to help you reduce the stress in your life.  Pick one or all to help you relax and find more peace in your life.

1-      Filter the negative aspects of your life.  Try limiting your media intake.  Since the news focuses on all the bad (with tiny doses of uplifting stories mixed in) you are adding to the burden of worry you already carry around.  Don't let toxic relationships tarnish your outlook on life.  If possible limit those relationships or learn how to block the harmful aspects of them.

2-      Try changing your diet.  Don't stress yourself out by trying to change all of your eating habits at once.  Instead, try making small changes in the beginning.  Find foods and drinks that are beneficial for your health.  Find foods that increase your metabolism.  Cut back on the foods that offer quick fixes, such as caffeine and sugars.  Increase fruits (oranges and blueberries are great stress-busters) as well as vegetables.  Foods high in vitamin B have a soothing effect on you system.  Allow yourself to become comfortable with the changes as you either eliminate or add to your diet. 

3-      Meditation and exercise go hand and hand.  Again don't overdo it.  You know your limitations and you know what you can achieve.  Don't stress yourself into thinking that if you can't get up an hour early every morning and run around the block you aren't accomplishing anything.  Do things slowly, find your pace, one that works for you.  You can find just about anything on the internet.  Do a search, read up on relaxation exercises.  Tai Chi and Qi gong both offer natural stress relief exercises.

4-       Write, write, write.  If your stress comes from NOT writing, STOP.  Give yourself permission to step away from the writing you feel you are supposed to be doing and write about something totally different.  It doesn't matter if you are writing a 'to do' list, menu for the coming week or jotting down something as simple as "Today I accomplished…"  Do prompts, small bits of writing that have nothing to do with your work in progress.  This is your key to keeping the momentum going.  When you are ready you'll know that you've been putting pencil to paper (fingers to keyboard), so all isn't lost. 

5-      Build your network.  This is one of the most important keys to stress reduction.  Friends can and will always be a source of insight into what you need.  Whether they know it or not, they offer you something you would not have sitting all alone. They provide a sense of connection.  Through them, you'll find laughter, tears, inspiration and so much more.  If you're feeling cut off and want to find a way to connect, join online groups, find classes or organizations in your area that are of interest.  Be willing to smile, encourage and offer a sympathetic shoulder when needed.  By helping others you help yourself.

Stress can and will inhibit your creativity if you let it.  It's all up to you.  With a positive attitude and a willingness to try something new you'll manage the stress in your life and come out a winner.

DeAnn Sicard is a former Golden Heart nominee. She writes contemporary romance and short stories.
http://awritersguidetowords.com/

Writing Through Hardship

One dear writer friend was tested in Biblical proportions, all within one year. A major move across the continent, new home...then fire on one side, massive flooding on the other--the worst her country recorded in 118 years.

A daughter with a history of miscarriages who became pregnant with twins, another child with legal problems not of his making, a husband diagnosed with cancer, and often no way of getting him to the hospital because of the flood. Before life settled, she ventured toward becoming the female epitome of Job. Loss of spouse, far from her children, precarious health--surgeries of her own, and left alone to contend with the aftermath.

If she can recoup, anyone can.

Tragedy leaves us fragile, often shattered emotionally, physically, and spiritually. We doubt our own judgment, not just the benevolence of a caring God. Our beliefs are tested and our self-confidence is in ruins. This is the point where we draw on the love, devotion, and core beliefs we have invested over the years in our friends as well as ourselves.

Another author friend lived for nearly two decades with psychological abuse, with a spouse who said the most vile things to her. Victims of this sort bear mostly invisible crosses, and few see even those because abusers generally estrange their victims from friends, loved ones, anyone who is a positive influence. Why? Control. It feeds their sickness. Quite often, the more we give them, the worse our situation.

My next statement will cause friction from some of you, but before you lash out, think. There are two types of victims--willing and unwilling, yet each of us (and yes, I speak from experience) has chosen to be where we are at any given time. Doesn't matter why. We have opted to remain in relationships, to allow someone else to make us feel less than we are. The wonderful thing is that we don't have to put up with their abuse. If you are a victim, take back your power. Your life and your writing depend upon it.

Maybe you're a victim of yourself. Bad decisions, gluttony or its opposite--starvation. Maybe you abuse alcohol, drugs, relationships, or something else. Perhaps you abuse your time. We each have the same number of hours in a day, yet some folks accomplish more. Sometimes it's because they are better at managing their time. Often it's because they refuse to allow others to sabotage them, to suck the life out of their day. No matter your situation, you can still choose to stop the behaviors that keep you from living a full and happy life.

One thing that is certain about our lives, as well as our planet is that spring follows winter. Seasons of hardship are followed by those of promise. So hang in there. Shore up all the good you can, and you'll have that and more when winters strike.

How? Start with yourself. Louise Hay states that how we begin our day is how we live our day, and how we live our days is how we live our lives. Why not start each morning with self-love and extend that to everyone we encounter? Tell that person in the mirror: you are a wonderful writer, a magnificent being. That beats negativity any day.

If you can't reaffirm your creativity, your very existence, as positive, who can? After that, express caring to others, even if to a pet, your neighbor, a stranger you meet. Smile. Find reasons other than those of hardship to motivate you.

Knowing what to write isn't always a writer's downfall. Not knowing how to say it is. Not believing in ourselves enough to express ourselves authentically, to be our true self, is what keeps us from our dreams and goals.

More on developing the author's authentic voice on May 1st. For now, let's get in shape. Let's discover what makes us tick, what thrills us, what we need to avoid, and what we need to embrace.

One of the funniest things, as a writer, that I hear people say: I could be a great writer if I only had time. Sorry, but…bullshit. And when they offer up THEIR ideas, as if I don't have enough of my own? That's when I rudely double up in laughter and have to turn away.

C'mon, readers. Suck it up. Claim your life. Begin your adventure, and share it with others.

Sunny